I was reading through some of my favorite blogs this morning when I came across something sad – a post by a dear woman who struggles with her weight. She wrote that she hoped her son would choose someone skinny because weight-loss takes too much energy. And I was surprised by how much her words affected me.
Normally, statements made by others (especially when they’re not directed specifically at me) roll off my back. But her statement (which she had every right to make, of course) has been on my mind a lot this afternoon. I find myself feeling sad for her, but I also feel defensive with a tinge of anger.
Let’s start with the sadness I feel for her. I understand that losing weight isn’t easy, but most things worth having require some work. I have a feeling that my blog friend is much more lovely and unique than she gives herself credit for being. And it makes me sad to think that she’s on a similar journey and not enjoying herself. Not everyone feels the same..I know. But if I had realized how much fun I could have losing weight I would have started much sooner.
My defensive feelings come from a very personal place. As an overweight 29 year old who, by the way, is living out my dreams every freaking day, I feel pretty offended that she hopes that her son will never choose (a younger version of) someone like me.
Losing weight takes energy, sure – so does going to law school and graduating with honors. But isn’t that accomplishment worth the energy? Beating cancer takes a lot of energy too, but again…is it not worth it? And yes, it takes more energy to go out and enjoy the lives we’ve been given than it does to sit on the sidelines while life flies by without us, but isn’t it worth the energy to live?
I believe in being extraordinary. And though I am far from perfect, I am living my life with that purpose in mind. I also believe I can do anything I want to do, and I see the proof when I look in the mirror. And while I wish I could say that I’m the exception, I know that I’m just one more person in a sea of people who are doing their best (most days) to be the person they choose to be.
As I said, I know that my blog friend was not directing her comments at me. And I know that I shouldn’t take her comments so personally. I think she was simply wishing her son a life without complication. But it’s always complicated. And thin or not, we’ll all suffer through trials at some point.
I can’t forget to mention how much energy I have now that I’ve taken an interest in losing weight. I feel like a completely new person. I jog for pleasure. Weird, right? But it just proves that life really is what we make it, and our attitudes greatly impact our well-being. It’s not easy to change who you are from the inside out, but that’s what I’m doing. And in my estimation, it is energy well spent.