Guest Post Reflection

What It Should Have Been

Last night I wrote a post that called “Am I Really Saying This Again? that should have been called “I’m Going To Keep Saying This.” The truth is that it doesn’t matter that I fall as long as I keep getting up.

Believe me, I would love to lose weight at the speed I lost for so long, and I would guess I will again at some point. But I’m actively taking control of my life, and I’ve been doing that for well over a year. And if I have to remind myself to do so daily then so be it.

Deb left a comment on yesterday’s post that touched me to the core, and I’d like to share it. Comments like the one she left yesterday truly are the best part of blogging. To know that someone understands precisely what you’re going through is comforting. She is wise and compassionate so if you don’t read her blog start today.

Here’s what she said…

You know, sometimes it DOES seem as though the food struggles go away. It does. There are those strong seasons in which saying no to food is just a decision–not a struggle. And a decision we carry out with success.
The strong days. Those are the days when we look at other people’s struggles and sympathize, but are glad we’ve found the secret and hope they find it, too. We found what clicks. The right food combination, the right habits, the right mindset. Then somehow, what worked isn’t working. The clicks we were so confident in aren’t clicking. Something happened, usually something emotional/mental. Sometimes it’s obvious, sometimes we have to figure out what set us off. But as we look out from under a bad food choice, dazed and confused, we realize that we need to get back on track. We make the decisions we made before, the choices we made before, the battle plan we made before–that all worked. Only now they don’t. So we decide again. And again. And again. And, sometimes, panic threatens. We blog and express our fear and frustration. Some commenters are in that strong place–that place that they think is permanent because they did the right things–and they give advice or lectures. Others are where we are, or remember when they were, and offer compassion and hope. Eventually, as we determinedly do not give up–that strong place appears again and we stand in it. This time, there will be no haughty confidence that tells us and everyone else that we’ve got it down. This time we know that we’re standing in Grace, a grace we cooperate with, but do not create. And we hold on tight, with gratitude and relief. The moral of my story? Recognize that this is a cycle that every dieter goes through. Never give up. Search out your emotional issues and the lies those issues are whispering in your ear–and tell yourself the truth, instead. Keep deciding and doing that next right thing–no matter how many times you falter. Expect grace to appear, putting that strong place under your next right step. We’re going to keep doing this thing, Kenz. We’re going to grap hold of what’s true and we’re going to get back to a strong footing. I’m praying for us to find what clicks for us now and for us to come to that strong place–again.

I’m praying that I find what clicks too Deb. And I think most of us are or have at some point. Thank you for being a friend and supporter on this journey.

Do you experience periods of care-free healthy living? Is it a constant struggle for you? How do you work it out each day?

********

And just because I love this little girl and this picture, I’m sharing it. =) I love my sweet niece! =)

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10 Comments

  • Reply
    Earl & Betty
    December 29, 2010 at 8:05 pm

    I loved her post as well. I have been dieting for 40 years, and I believe even when I thought I had a handle on things, I never did. I watched my niece react just like me when I was doing great, she would do WW all week, then one day a week she would eat anything she wanted (anything). She lost a ton of weight and it worked for her, but when she hit a snag she continued to eat like it was her free day. That was her favorite foods, and now she has all her weight back. I have done the same thing in a different way so many times. Now I really want to just learn to eat in a way that gives me good health, good energy, and yes less pounds. I wish you the best, and I am certain you will find your way.

  • Reply
    Earl & Betty
    December 29, 2010 at 8:05 pm

    I loved her post as well. I have been dieting for 40 years, and I believe even when I thought I had a handle on things, I never did. I watched my niece react just like me when I was doing great, she would do WW all week, then one day a week she would eat anything she wanted (anything). She lost a ton of weight and it worked for her, but when she hit a snag she continued to eat like it was her free day. That was her favorite foods, and now she has all her weight back. I have done the same thing in a different way so many times. Now I really want to just learn to eat in a way that gives me good health, good energy, and yes less pounds. I wish you the best, and I am certain you will find your way.

  • Reply
    Deb Willbefree
    December 29, 2010 at 8:44 pm

    Thanks, Kenz. What a lovely and generous intro you wrote to my comment.

    And, YES, we ARE going to keep saying this! Your opening paragraph is what we all need to decide. To never give up.

    Someone who refuses to quit, can't be beaten. Not even by food, habits or emotional baggage that keeps snapping open and spilling its guts. (Well, okay, maybe I just have a lot of suitcases…)

    We're doing this thing!

    Deb

  • Reply
    SeattleRunnerGirl
    December 29, 2010 at 9:46 pm

    Amen to all of this. I have definitely had long stretches where making healthy choices felt easy. And ones where it all feels so hard I want to scream. But through it all, what I have realized, is that I AM WORTH IT. I am worth the effort and the work and the grace and the love it will take to do the healthy living thing forever. So are you, friend!

  • Reply
    PlushBelle
    December 30, 2010 at 2:15 am

    I am not far enough into my weight loss to comment honestly. However I have already seen several days of easy healthy eating and other days that I just can't seem to make the right choices. I hope figuring that out will help my journey along – eventually.

  • Reply
    Veronica
    December 30, 2010 at 3:43 am

    Like you, Kenz, I am beyond grateful for who Deb is… God uses her in so many ways in my life and in the lives of others. I think she should write a book – several, in fact… Maybe you and I can convince her 🙂 I also think we should visit her one of these days! 🙂

    I'm proud of you. And I'm honored to be your blog-friend and twitter-friend. Your honesty inspires me. Your progress inspires me. Your living inspires me.

    I, too, am praying "it clicks" for me, too. Until then, we'll keep moving forward… or as our good friend likes to say, "Onward & Upward!" 🙂
    ((HUGS))

  • Reply
    Veronica
    December 30, 2010 at 3:45 am

    PS Thanks for your comment on my blog! I"m incredibly proud of both of us, too!! Back on track… one decision at a time… let's push through this season…
    The first week was easy for me. This third week has proven harder. Much harder. I'm learning to control my environment more…. because of failing too many times before, even recently. We're in this together… gaining our lives as we lose the weight. You got this, Kenz. I believe in you. All of us do.

  • Reply
    anewertammy
    December 30, 2010 at 3:49 am

    Yes, if we need to keep saying it over and over we will take back control. Love Deb's comment, it is so true. For me, it seems everyday is a struggle so far. Maybe next year, I will find my groove and experience some of those days where everything clicks and decisions are made more easily.

    Your niece is so cute. I have one nephew, 18 months old and I adore him.

  • Reply
    Shane G.
    December 30, 2010 at 11:08 am

    Kenz, I haven't learned a whole lot in my life, but the one thing I do know, don't push for the sake of pushing. You had to get into the right mind set to do the amazing things you have done to date. You will have to get in the right mindset to get to where you are going now. Just thinking you are going to "just do it" can lead to failure and frustration. I am of the mind you will wake up one day, and it will be there. You will wow everyone once again and take off like a rocket. Just hold on for now, and be ready when it gets here!

  • Reply
    Steelers6
    January 1, 2011 at 5:24 pm

    Hey, girl, I LOVE that picture of you 2 girls in the car! Hee..

    I have not been a rock over Thanksgiving & Christmas, but not crazy, either. Just not quite as good as I've been doing, and I actually put exercise aside for a bit in order to get everything done. And yes, sadly, a few lbs found their way back. And while I am not delighted about any of this, I am not overly concerned, bc I know WE! will get back in our groove.

    Thanks for highlighting what dear Deb wrote, bc I missed it first time around. I have also had to set aside keeping up with my fave blogs! (horrors!) over these 3 holidays in a row.

    Sometimes life can seem mundane, in a rut and such, and of course holidays and time spent with our loved ones is precious. But it can also feel good to get back to the mundane!

    Here's to normal & routine! Happy 2011, sweetie.
    Chrissy

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