Family Love Reflection

Mom’s Problems With My Last Post

Mom: I’m going to say something to you, and I don’t want you to get mad.

Me: Oh no, Mom..this can’t be good. What is it?

Mom: Well, it’s just that I read your blog today.

Me: You read my blog everyday.

Mom: Yes, but today you sounded so desperate.

Me: I believe I actually even used the word “desperate” in today’s post. I don’t mean I’m desperate to settle for any old guy. You know darn well I could have done that at 20 years old or any number of times since.

Mom: But you said you like someone. Who do you like?

Me: Just this guy that I’ve been talking to a little.  I’m planning on spending some time with him next week.

Mom: Well, it sounds so forceful when you say “Make it happen.”

Me: Mom, I’m not demanding it or something.  I’m just flirting with him via my blog in case he reads it. No big deal.

Mom: And how do you know he’s all of those good things?

Me: He’s nice to me, he can do pull-ups and he can, uh, scale mountains with a 50 lb pack on his back. I’d say that’s strong, no? (Literally LOL-ing by this point) But it’s nothing to get worked up about. We’ll see what happens later.

Mom: Well, I don’t want people to think you’re desperate.

Me: Let me read a few excerpts from my blog real quick. “…I’m not willing to settle or go out with someone just because he asks.  I want quality…” 

Mom: Well, it makes more sense when I hear the inflection in your voice, but still…you’re okay how you are. You don’t need anyone to make you better. (This coming from a woman who doesn’t want me to die alone. ha)

Me: Here’s something else I said, “…I know that I am fine on my own and that I would be fine on my own for a long, long time.   And let me be clear – I do not want to go back and live in the past.  I want to move forward and be with someone who is right for me.  I don’t want to rush into a relationship or marriage either, but I want something real with someone who is strong and loyal and kind. I want to flirt, hold hands, *get butterflies*, mutually enjoy the good company and go from there.”

Interjection by step-dad: Oh whaaaaaat? You put stuff like that on your blog for everyone to read? Really? ::shakes his head in shame::

Me: I write about most things on my blog. I’ve been doing it for, you know, over two years now.  People are usually really respectful and often appreciate the personal things I share.

—–

It’s hard to explain to those who don’t blog how cathartic and all-around incredible it is to lay it all out honestly.  I realize that I say things that my parents and family don’t want to see, but I am careful to stay away from topics that would cause embarrassment and/or any other negative feelings.

But this is how I feel.  I’m far from desperate, kind of.  I’m not desperate to love someone just because they’re around.  If that were the case, I could have married my first boyfriend at 20 or a few others since.  I suppose that desperate was a poor choice of words on my part.  So…just to be clear, I mean I desperately long for someone to love who will love me back. 

And I said yesterday, I deserve someone incredible.  And I have absolutely no intention of settling for someone just because he asks me out on a date.  Seriously, I’m too busy for that kind of nonsense.  Any questions?

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13 Comments

  • Reply
    ThunderThighs
    April 13, 2011 at 1:34 am

    Lol, moms kill me – they always get all worked up about their daughters' life, even when everything is under control. Be thankful your mom cares! Too cute 🙂

  • Reply
    safire
    April 13, 2011 at 2:12 am

    This is why I don't share my blog with my parents. They overanalzye EVERY single thing I write. It drives me crazy.

    You aren't desperate! You just know what you want and the area you are in seems like there's less opportunity!

  • Reply
    Deb Willbefree
    April 13, 2011 at 2:34 am

    Oh, dear. chuckle. It's hard being a mom. LOL! Really.

    And tell your mom that this mom says, "I understand." 😀

    Deb

  • Reply
    Steelers6
    April 13, 2011 at 3:28 am

    Aww..I sure didn't take it that way. But Mom cares. Hi Joan!, & hee hee about stepdad's comment. Better only read the recipe blogs you write to stepdad. 🙂

    Because you have brought us along with some glimpses of the single & dating journey, and have shared your heart, I can't help but fast foward to REJOICING with you the day we are given the news of Mr. Kenz.

    You are loved, my dear.
    Chrissy

  • Reply
    ♥ Shrinking Kenz ♥
    April 13, 2011 at 3:28 am

    LOL Deb. I'll tell her! She will be happy to hear it. <3

  • Reply
    ♥ Shrinking Kenz ♥
    April 13, 2011 at 3:35 am

    Chrissy…lol You're always so supportive, but today you cracked me up too…Mr. Kenz…lol Maybe someday…haha

  • Reply
    Lucy
    April 13, 2011 at 3:39 am

    Oh my.

    Mothers and blogs – I have a few stories around that too.

    Kenz, this is the first time to your blog and I love it. YOU are a goddess and your journey so far is inspirational. (It goes without saying that I am now following you!)

    I have lost nearly 90lb over the past three years (and still going) so to see that you have done 100lb in just a year is so inspiring.

    Lucy X
    http://www.diminishinglucy.com

  • Reply
    Roz
    April 13, 2011 at 4:07 am

    Awww! Your Mom's "mama's instinct" kicked in. So sweet. But if its any consolation, I didn't think your post sounded desperate at ALL. It's ok to say you want to find someone special. To me, it's just a statement of fact and really, is no different than saying I want a better job or I want to lose weight. Have a great day Kenz.

  • Reply
    KCLAnderson (Karen)
    April 13, 2011 at 1:01 pm

    Oh I so get it…it's true…most people don't "get" how powerful blogging is. My husband would sometimes feel so bad for me based on what I'd written on my blog and he hated that it appeared that I was hurting or whatever…and sometimes I was but the act of writing it out is what helps! It's a brave new world, for sure!

  • Reply
    | PN |
    April 13, 2011 at 3:03 pm

    Parents make me laugh. I am so glad you have the relationship you do with them that you can have that talk, though!

    Good for you!

  • Reply
    Darlene
    April 13, 2011 at 3:15 pm

    It IS hard being a mom. I would probably have reacted the same way. Oh wait. I think I did have a similar conversation with my daughter! Oh dear. We try.

  • Reply
    Shannon B.
    April 13, 2011 at 3:16 pm

    I read your blog yesterday and let me say that I did not feel one ounce of desperation or oversharing. You were honest and I'm willing to bet that those single girls reading your blog let out a collective AMEN after what you wrote. I'm engaged and even I did! It took a while to find it, but I found it and you will to and I did LOL at your "Make it happen!" comment. That was great, not desperate!!!

  • Reply
    kristi
    April 14, 2011 at 1:46 am

    Yeah I don't share my blog with family……but I hope you find ur dream guy!

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