Discipline Goals

Small Goals That Seem Big

What I’ve been doing isn’t working. I gained 8 pounds while I was away from my Weight Watchers meetings, and while it would be easy to hang my head in shame and waddle away into an abyss of junk food and self-loathing, I’ve decided not to do that.  Big surprise there, huh? 😉

I’ve gotten comments lately (that I haven’t published) suggesting that I give up, admit defeat, have surgery and/or accept that I’ll always be fat.  Those folks have a right to their opinions, but they don’t carry any weight here.

I’ve also gotten comments on Facebook saying to lose the scale, but the fact remains that my biggest focus has been (and needs to be once again) on healthy living with a focus on weight-loss.  And it’s glaringly obvious that I need the scale to help me stay accountable.

Weight-loss is what I want.

Feeling good in my clothes is what I want.

Believing my boyfriend when he tells me I’m pretty is what I want.

Looking in the mirror and realizing that I’m doing what it takes again is what I want.

So I will…..track my food intake (every bite) in my little Weight Watchers tracker. I will exercise at least 5 times (I think I need to do something more intense than shredding if I want to reach this goal so I’ll hit the gym as well) and focus on reaching my immediate goals.

My goal for the next month is to lose 14 pounds.  It’s a lofty goal, and I’ll be proud of myself if I get close to it.  But I cannot see beyond those 14 pounds so I’ll worry about everything else later.  For now, my goal in numbers is 14.  Losing 14 pounds will bring me to my lowest recorded Weight Watchers weight – the point in which I looked like this:

A less bloated version of myself (with Dad) from this time last year...

I don’t know what to do except try again. I’d ask you to wish me luck, but I think it’s strength and willpower and discipline that I need.  And that has to come from inside myself.  But hey, you can wish me luck anyway.

 

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39 Comments

  • Reply
    Becca
    December 3, 2011 at 4:25 am

    Good on you for ignoring the negative comments.

    Weightloss is not easy for everyone. Many of us fight this for years on end. Ideally I would have conquered this years ago but I haven’t and I know it’s probably going to be something I work on all my life.

    In the great scheme of what you have lost 8lbs is NOT a lot!!!

    Don’t let people bring you down, keep your head held high and give it your best!

    You can do this and I have every faith in you. x

  • Reply
    Nan
    December 3, 2011 at 5:06 am

    My problem is I am great at maintaining but I want to maintain a weight at least 25 pounds less than now, drat it! I know you can do it-just remember it’s not willpower but IMO planning is the key and sounds like you are ready to plan exercise and a healthy diet. OK I’ll say it- GOOD LUCK with the 14 pound goal.

  • Reply
    Moose
    December 3, 2011 at 5:18 am

    GOOD LUCK 😀 😀 😀
    You can totally do it, and no-one (except you) has any right saying otherwise.
    I have had the same thing this year (just about to blog about it in the next day or two) but I just think, it’s all part of the process and you just have to keep moving on. The only thing that will stop this from happening in the long term is giving up completely but as long as you can get up and keep going, you will get there eventually.
    I’m making today Day One (again) and 14 pounds this month would get me to a much better point so I’m with you all the way! Let’s go do it!

  • Reply
    Lisa Q
    December 3, 2011 at 7:13 am

    You go girl!!! You are an inspiration to many; never give up!

    I just hit 110 lb loss and I the scale is very important to me also. It need to see the numbers, how else can I know how I am doing.

    Lisa Q

  • Reply
    Jane at Keepingthepoundsoff.com
    December 3, 2011 at 7:20 am

    Kenlie,
    When people belittle others they are simply mean and do not know any other way to make themselves happy. And that is sad. You are right to remove their excess baggage from your comments.
    I have written you before. I still support your efforts and hope you can find the simplicity that you need to move toward your weight loss goals. I am glad you are not considering surgery or giving up.
    I am a low-bottom overeater. I have been keeping the pounds off for several years now. If I can keep off 200+ pounds without surgery or medications then I know others can to. I know you can do it.

  • Reply
    kristi
    December 3, 2011 at 7:29 am

    I know what you mean. The damn scale keeps me accountable. Hang in there!

  • Reply
    Morphidae
    December 3, 2011 at 8:25 am

    The constant “why don’t you have the surgery” is indeed annoying. But as I tell them, it’s stomach surgery, not brain surgery. And if I can do it on my own, however slowly (120 down!), then I certainly don’t need to mutilate my body.

  • Reply
    Aimee
    December 3, 2011 at 9:10 am

    Your post brought tears to my eyes. I’ve been there. I’m still there in many ways. You can do this. You have all the tools you need. If it were easy we would all be thin. It’s not easy to change habits that have been a part of our lives for a long time. Good for you for acknowledging that what you’re currently doing isn’t working instead of continuing on that path. The scale is important to some extent. Only you can decide how often you need to use the scale as a tool to measure weight loss. One bad day, week or even month is not an excuse to give up. Each meal, each day is an opportunity to make new choices, better choices. Keep going Kenlie. You will do this!

  • Reply
    KCLAnderson (Karen)
    December 3, 2011 at 9:26 am

    Strength and willpower and discipline…and most of all, love. Find that love inside for yourself.

  • Reply
    Emily
    December 3, 2011 at 10:07 am

    “Courage. Determination. Momentum.” -KeepItUpDavid.com

    Do it, girl. You have the strength, willpower, and discipline inside you to accomplish your goals. I read your blog nearly daily, in total admiration for what you’ve accomplished and how far you’ve come. You’ve encouraged me to do more, be more, reach for more than anyone else I’ve (virtually) met.

  • Reply
    Morgan
    December 3, 2011 at 10:07 am

    Why do people who would leave you comments like that even read your blog? Small, small people, who need to make themselves feel better by hurting someone else. Ugh.

    We all are trying. You aren’t giving up, and that is the first step. So much of the time I just want to quit, and sometimes I give in. But it always comes back around. Your determination is inspiring.

  • Reply
    suzanne
    December 3, 2011 at 11:19 am

    You are so strong and capable! I know you can do it. Good for you on ignoring the advice of others who simply don’t know just how amazingly determined you are!

  • Reply
    desertnails8
    December 3, 2011 at 11:47 am

    Okay, well you’ve got me thinking again about my own struggles. My focus this week is on eating 2 cups of vegetables with every meal and that’s been a challenge (though I love vegetables they seem like a lot of effort to prepare). As I catch myself at mealtimes not wanting to fix veggies I am trying to remind myself this is self-care and it is how a person treats a beautiful body (something I aspire to have). Also, being full of veggies makes it easier to say no more often to holiday sweets. So, I wanted to let you know what has been helpful for me and to wish you lots of thoughts of loving self-care for that beautiful body.

  • Reply
    Beth@WeightMaven
    December 3, 2011 at 11:55 am

    I’m completely with you (remember, we’re in a similar place in terms of starting weights and where we are). You wrote: “I think I need to do something more intense than shredding if I want to reach this goal so I’ll hit the gym as well.”

    Me, I think Mark Sisson has the right idea for exercise … it’s not about burning calories, it’s about giving your body the right signals that help it burn fat better. So you want to avoid what Sisson calls “chronic cardio” (which typically fights against you because of raised cortisol levels) and instead, do shorter, more intense workouts, either weight lifting or my favorite — high intensity intervals a la sprints (I do mine in the pool … takes 20 minutes 2x a week) along with lots of low and slow.

    Be patient with yourself. I’d love to lose 14lbs in a month, but because of back issues and limited mobility, I’ve been lucky to average a pound and a half a week for the last several weeks. But it adds up eventually ;).

  • Reply
    Beth@WeightMaven
    December 3, 2011 at 11:56 am

    Oops. Meant to leave a link. Here’s more about Mark Sisson’s fitness approach (towards bottom of page): http://www.marksdailyapple.com/how-to-succeed-with-the-primal-blueprint/

  • Reply
    Tina
    December 3, 2011 at 1:17 pm

    You can do it.

    You know you can. 🙂

  • Reply
    auntiekim
    December 3, 2011 at 1:40 pm

    Kenlie, you can totally do this. I’ve quickly become one of your biggest fans. You’re a smart, beautiful girl with so much good stuff going on in your life. I’m so glad you aren’t letting the Negative Nellies get to you. Not sure I would have the same strength if I was in your position, so brava to you. I did have surgery and it changed my life. I’m much older than you and the health circumstances were different. I encourage everyone to walk their own path. I just don’t ever want you, or any of your readers, to think it’s taking the easy way out. I debated for 10+ years before I finally did it and I don’t look back for one second. Anyway, I will be here to cheer you on, through successes and setbacks, because that’s what I think we’re here for. To encourage and motivate and celebrate eachother’s successes. Love you, girlie <3

  • Reply
    mary
    December 3, 2011 at 2:06 pm

    i always find it interesting that those telling you to stop are your biggest critics
    the ones who talk behind your back and find everything you are trying to do a big inconvenience for them.
    keep doing what you are doing kenlie. it’s for you, it’s what YOU want.
    the others will just have to deal with it
    xo

  • Reply
    Bella
    December 3, 2011 at 2:42 pm

    You’ve got the right mindset not to let the 8 lbs turn into 10 or 15. I know for myself, whenever I’m in a new relationship, I tend to focus on the fun (which often means eating out) and forget about my routine. Sounds like maybe the same thing has been going on for you, especially with the holidays.

    14 pounds is a good goal, and one that you can achieve if you put your full effort to it, which I have every confidence you will.

  • Reply
    Beth
    December 3, 2011 at 4:00 pm

    Of course you can do this. It’s when, not if.

  • Reply
    Jillian
    December 3, 2011 at 4:04 pm

    First of all, eff the haters, seriously.

    Second of all–you and I BOTH need to get that willpower and determination back It can be so fleeting sometimes, can’t it?

    Hope that this week is easier for you than the last few have been.

  • Reply
    Caron
    December 3, 2011 at 4:15 pm

    I agree that you should NOT GIVE UP. And, this is the perfect time of year to lose weight and feel better. I know because I did it last holiday season when I got back to goal in December after being above it for two full years.

  • Reply
    dad
    December 3, 2011 at 5:11 pm

    as i see it weight gain did not come by surgery, and while i do believe in extreme circumstances, surgery is a viable alternative, it is not without it’s risks. there are lifelong issues with surgery. bottom line either way, surgical or non surgical approaches, require lifestyle changes. surgery is not a cure all, fix all, for the majority. but for those in dire health situations, it is a reasonable option.

  • Reply
    Amy
    December 3, 2011 at 5:21 pm

    Mean people stink! You know what you need to do. I’ve been doing WW for 2 months and it definitely keeps me accountable knowing I’ve got to weigh in once a week. I also go with a friend and we help eachother out during the week at work. Hang in there!

  • Reply
    Marion
    December 3, 2011 at 9:10 pm

    Hi Kenlie! Well, I’d definitely mark those comments as “spam.” I wonder what kind of stupid people waste their time writing those kinds of comments. I hope the best for you, really truly!

    🙂 Marion

  • Reply
    Annie Weighs
    December 3, 2011 at 9:29 pm

    I’m up 13.6 from my lowest WW weight. UGH! I’m starting over again, right along with you! One day at a time, we’ll do it! 🙂 <3 ya girl, so so so so so so sorry I haven't been reading your blog for quite awhile (or anyone's for that matter). My head is back in the game now! Let's end 2011 with a scale success!

  • Reply
    Shannon
    December 3, 2011 at 9:54 pm

    Good for you for not listening to the negative people who comment and tell you to give up and have surgery! The way I see it, surgery is a necessity for some people; those that are so overweight that their physical bodies or accompanying ailments will not allow them to exercise and work the weight off on their own. If you are capable of doing it on your own, then you owe it to yourself to DO IT. And you CAN do it! You have two choices….take the easy road knowing you can do this on your own OR do this on your own without the help of surgery, learn a lot about yourself, and conquer this for life!

    I don’t comment much, but I do read your posts and you are such an inspiration! Never give up on yourself!

  • Reply
    MissJ
    December 3, 2011 at 11:32 pm

    Never loose faith in yourself

  • Reply
    MissJ
    December 3, 2011 at 11:33 pm

    Never lose faith in yoursefl I meant

  • Reply
    AthleteComesBack
    December 4, 2011 at 3:18 am

    Kenlie,

    I am in the same boat as you. I have been “running” (as in dodging people, social media) now for six weeks as I have been off track. I personally have thoughts that I can’t do this, heck even thought maybe that surgery is the only way I will be at my ideal weight, however I rebuke those thoughts. I am back and ready to start. I will weigh in later today and will track everything. I didn’t have a goal as to how much I want to lose, but after reading your post I will shoot for 14 pounds with you. I know it is an aggressive goal, but I will try to get as close as possible.

    You can do it Kenlie, I am rooting for you!!!

  • Reply
    Missy
    December 4, 2011 at 7:45 am

    You’ve encouraged me to not give up. I wasn’t going to go to my meeting on Dec. 6th as I know I’ve gained. But I will face that scale and vow to never see another gain again. I will start over and I will do this. Thanks Kenlie for this post. Good luck to you. You can do it!!

  • Reply
    Jennifer
    December 4, 2011 at 9:24 am

    You will never give up. 😉 This is thing that pulses through you veins! You speak for so many, and you have such courage. It’s ok! We can all relate to the down time, where something has discouraged us and we take time out to lick our wounds. Some give up, but you, you come back stronger than before! Just having your posts show up in my inbox daily-ish 😉 since I found you again a few days ago has made me think more about what is going in my mouth. I didn’t give a damn the week of Thanksgiving…and it showed. 🙁 Now, just by being aware of what I’m doing and knowing I’m not some lone warrior in the battle has helped some of my most recent indiscretions melt away. Holidays are hard, but I’m not going to fret this year. I’m going to make better decisions. I’m going to utilize my resources, you being one of them, to keep my intentions afloat. You’re not alone Kenlie.

  • Reply
    Kris
    December 4, 2011 at 10:43 am

    As I’m learning, now 18 months into maintenance, small gains (and in the big picture, 8 pounds is small) do happen. The important part is recognizing them, and doing what is necessary to stop the gain! You are doing that. 🙂

    As for surgery – that is a personal decision. No one can make it for you, and no one should criticize you for whatever decision you make about surgery, yea or nay! It is YOUR body, and your journey. And every single one of us takes a different path.

    Keep mixing it up, trying new things (like new workouts), but if you know WW works for you…. then get back on the horse, and keep going. 14 pounds is an achievable goal – difficult, but doable.

    Good luck. 🙂

  • Reply
    Becki
    December 4, 2011 at 10:46 am

    So proud of you. You can do this.

  • Reply
    heryl
    December 4, 2011 at 2:19 pm

    For some of us surgery was our answer but I would never ever tell anyone who was choosing a different way to lose weight (unless it was stupidly unhealthy) to just give up! I can’t believe people would do that! Don’t listen to them! They’re not worthy of your attention if they don’t have your back they’re not your friends.

    I will be rooting for every single pound for you!

  • Reply
    Vanessa
    December 4, 2011 at 4:10 pm

    You CAN do it. Ignore the negativity. You know what feels right. Go with it. *hugs*

  • Reply
    Elanor
    December 4, 2011 at 11:29 pm

    I don’t understand people that want surgery! So much money and so dangerous! You’re right that you just need to keep on working at it and that’s what you’ve been doing.

    Anything worth doing isn’t easy. You’ve worked hard so far and we (all the people that care) know you will keep going.

  • Reply
    Dominique
    December 5, 2011 at 3:59 pm

    You can do it! 🙂

  • Reply
    SC
    December 5, 2011 at 4:09 pm

    can i suggest working out more? The elliptical is okay, but really 45 minutes of that a day isn’t really going to cut it. try running or walking. walking is so super easy and you can do it with Cal! I do it all day on the weekends, and I usually walk about 10-15 miles each day sat and sunday (its kind of the weekend activity). I also am a runner and i love it, but I dont know if you run that much now but walking will allow you to ease in to it.

    I’m just telling you this because if you walk 10 miles, you could probably burn almost 1,000 calories (I’m estimating based on your weight) and well..that’s alot!

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