After a post I wrote earlier this week, I had to face some real feelings and thoughts, and while it’s not easy to share them, I’m going to. Here’s where I stand (and where I’ve been standing longer than I care to admit) right now. I feel stuck. I weigh 12 pounds less right now than I did at the beginning of the year, but it has been far too long since I made substantial progress.
I’m not discounting the fact that I exercise like a champ on a consistent basis…nor am I belittling the fact that I’ve managed to maintain my 100 pound loss. These are both incredible things, and I’m damn proud of what I’ve accomplished so far. That said, I’m not happy with where I am now. My eating habits need to change, and they need to change now.
As I write this post, I’ve just successfully completed the first day of a personal challenge that I hope will spring board me into weight-loss once again. I’ve counted calories all day, and I’m ending the day having consumed 1,474 calories (most of which came from fruit, veggies, egg whites and other lean proteins.) My workout today included 30 minutes on the elliptical (easing back into it after being off for a month) and a strength workout for my arms followed by 5 minutes on the treadmill.
People say that weight-loss is easy, but those people often miss the point. I’ve lost 100 pounds. I know how to eat, but sometimes I find it extraordinarily difficult to convince myself that it’s a good idea. That’s the hard part, at least for me, so I’ve decided to eat about 1,300 calories on rest days and no more than 1,500 calories on workout days. I’ll listen to my body and do my best to adjust, but I think this is a healthy and realistic window that will yield good results.
I like the gym, and I like exercising outside when the weather allows it. I love to sweat, and I love to feel my heart pumping because it makes me feel strong and capable and athletic. Now it’s time to reintroduce healthy eating into my everyday life. And I’ve decided that for the next 30 days (probably longer, but this is my initial commitment) I’m going to track my caloric intake. I made a difficult and bitter decision to leave Weight Watchers shortly after they unveiled the new PointsPlus plan over a year ago, but I never fully committed to counting calories. What can I say? That was then, and this is now. I’m going to try again.
I realize that counting points and calories both work as long as you do it consistently, but I’ve been fighting with myself over the last few months to figure out how I can make PointsPlus work for me. I’ve posted several times about modifying the program to work for me by counting fruits, tracking EVERYTHING through the recipe builder, etc. But the fact is that a successful day in my WW tracker looks like about 2,400 calories, and that’s far too many.
I’ve wanted to believe that I could make PointsPlus work because I love the support of the meetings, and even more so because I feel so indebted to Weight Watchers for what the helped me achieve in losing the first 100 pounds. I also adored my first leader in New York, Jen, and my current leader, Penny. I’m also completely infatuated with David Kirchhoff, the most handsome, friendly and witty CEO of all time. (Swoon.) But the fact is that, I’ve complicated the new program so much in my head just to make it work at least a little bit, that the simplicity of calorie counting has been a relief today. I’m not saying goodbye to Weight Watchers. I’m just trying something new to see how it compares.
I’m tracking my intake through SparkPeople for a couple of reasons…First, because I like the people I know behind SparkPeople. You all know Coach Nicole now, right? She doesn’t know I’ve crossed over to the calorie counting side yet, but she will soon. 😉 And secondly, I love the SparkPeople iPhone app! It’s fantastic! In addition to tracking my caloric intake, I can also track my workouts. I can even get specific with my strength exercises, weights and reps. I’m in love with this app, and I like that it’s free.
So this is where I am. I’m starting over again because it seems like the right thing to do. And I’ve said before that I’ll restart as often as it takes. It’s better than throwing in the towel or refusing to face the fact that I’ve become complacent with food, right? Anyway, I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere…But I’d like to see my excess weight flee the scene, and I’m hoping that this big change in my routine will do the trick.
What’s the bigger challenge for you? Food or exercise? Do you track your calories everyday? Do you track you intake at all?