Last night as I was looking through the archives of my blog, I ran across one of my favorite posts. I wrote it about a year and a half ago, and I meant every word of it. At that time I was working hard and experiencing success on a regular basis, and I was encouraging others to do the same. It was around that time I started respecting myself. When I looked in the mirror I saw someone that I admired instead of the person that I had seen for so long before…the person that I pitied and despised. I believed in myself, and I knew that I could do anything. My body was proof.
After writing that post I continued moving forward, working out and living a healthy life, but losing weight became more difficult. I still worked out consistently and have for almost three years. And I’m not going to make excuses or try to justify my hardship because I can’t change the past, but finding this post reminded me of the days in which I truly believed in myself.
I thought back to the days in which I didn’t worry about the opinions of a random, mindless jerk who openly judged my body. I thought back to the days in which the most valuable opinion of me was my own, and I realized that the person who wrote these confident and resilient words is still me. I can choose to be ‘that girl’ who focuses on her positive accomplishments, or I can focus on the things that I have not yet accomplished. Which one do you think I’ll focus on today?
Looking back over the last year it’s easy to see that I still have work to do. I enjoy exercise, but I still have work to do in my relationship with food. And I am working on it. After a week of counting calories, I am satisfied with the results so now it’s on to week two.
I’m still far from perfect, but that has never been my goal. Instead I’m going to focus on being a person that I am proud to be today and strive to (once again) make my opinion the one that matters the most.