Lifestyle Reflection weight loss

Mixed Feelings

It has been almost a month since I posted here, and I have mixed feelings about that.  I love all of the positive aspects of blogging – the people, the inspiring stories, the community, but I no longer think that it’s healthy to subject myself to judgments from strangers and/or people who are just hoping for a reason to be rude.

I’ve had some emotional days recently, but overall I feel loved and valued and content in my life right now.  While I have become more private online, I’m an open book in my everyday life.  I wear my feelings on my sleeve, and I’ve noticed that people who look me in the eyes are much more gracious than those who hide behind their computer screens.  (Are we seeing a theme here?)

That said, I’ve been blogging here for almost five years, and over the last several months, I have considered developing a new site, in which I feel more comfortable discussing my thoughts and emotions on a range of issues.  I purchased a new domain name and set up the hosting for it, but I think I’d miss this blog too much to change it.

When I started this blog, my goal was to lose weight and to learn to love myself, and I’ve done both.  I regained some of what I lost, as I’ve stated in previous posts, but I love myself more than I could have imagined when I wrote my first post here almost five years ago.  I’ve managed to keep a significant amount of weight off too.

I’m not perfect, and I have no interest in pretending to be.  I’ve always owned my weight and taken responsibility for it.  I should have this figured out already.  I should have reached my goal a long time ago, blah, blah, blah…I know, I know, but I’m still here– still fighting to believe that I’m worth the effort, still exercising…

Kenlie Gym

My entire life has changed, and it is better than I ever would have imagined.  I thought I had it good five years ago, and I did.  I’m thankful for the incredible things that I’ve experienced so far, and I’m grateful for where I am today.

If you’re one of the encouraging people who has been here to keep me company on my little journey, then you should know that I miss you.  I’m not sure how to proceed, apart from dumping all of my feelings here again, so maybe I’ll do that soon…

Has anyone else here even taken a blogging break?  If so, do you think that it was a good idea?

 

 

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22 Comments

  • Reply
    Lisa
    March 19, 2014 at 5:26 am

    I enjoy reading your blog. It is real, honest and heartfelt. I feel that you are writing on my behalf because I don’t have the gift of writing. I never did even in school. So it is assuring that I am not alone on this journey of weight loss. Because it is a journey. We are not perfect at all. I have lost a lot of weight in the past 10 months. I started exercising slowly so my weight loss is slow but my numbers for cholesterol, blood pressure and glucose have decreased that my doctor removed all medication except reduced my metformin by half. Your words are encouraging and do make a difference. Thank you for being you.

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 20, 2014 at 5:18 pm

      That is amazing, Lisa. It makes me so incredibly happy to hear that. Good for you! And thank you..

  • Reply
    Brittany
    March 19, 2014 at 7:26 am

    I think about this constantly. I feel like blogging has changed a lot. It’s become harder and harder to feel motivated by all the fakeness and the audacity of how rude people can be behind a computer screen. Someday, I know I’ll give it up because I’ll get tired of the exposing of my life online, but I’m still holding onto blogging hoping that some of the reasons why I started will come around again.

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 20, 2014 at 5:19 pm

      There are things that I just don’t talk about here – specifics about my love life, etc. I still like unloading at times though, but I liked being gone for a while..

  • Reply
    Ann Wolfe
    March 19, 2014 at 8:06 am

    My blog has always been just a way to document for myself to ups and downs and experiences within my life. It is not always pretty and not always happy but it is always REAL!
    Sometimes I write a lot and sometimes weeks go by, but I only write when I feel like it,.
    I love my blogging friends and always read your blogs and I hope you read mine and get something out of it when I am writing…however, in the end I blog for myself. Imagine how happy I am going to be when I am in an old folks home with memory issues and I can re-read everything over and over and never have to forget for good?!?!
    I love your blog, no matter what you write about do it for you…that is why we have to option to moderate our blogs and the delete comment can be your BEST FRIEND! XO

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 20, 2014 at 5:21 pm

      I do moderate comments, but most don’t require it. I do like the plus sides that go along with blogging, specifically, my blog friends….:)

  • Reply
    Jen B
    March 19, 2014 at 9:23 am

    I’m glad to see you back here and if you DO start that new blog, I hope you tell us about it 🙂 I would love to keep following you!

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 20, 2014 at 5:21 pm

      Thanks, Jen…there’s something new coming, but I think this one will remain as well. I’ll definitely let you know.

  • Reply
    Tracey
    March 19, 2014 at 11:01 am

    I don’t really have enough followers to call it taking a break, but I will admit that I have gone through phases of blogging. When I was on different weight loss sites (SparkPeople or BuddySlim), but you are definitely correct in that some people hide behind their computer screen. Here’s my thought, I think whether you are writing it publicly on a blog or writing it privately in a journal, it is about getting it out there and (hopefully) receiving support for what you are doing and what you are going through. I have enjoyed following you and your journey. Yes, you have ups and downs, but that is why it is called a journey. You are learning about yourself and what you can live with for the rest of your life and that is so important. No matter what you do, I have no doubt that you can ROCK IT! The haters are gonna hate, but you are doing what you need to do for you. It doesn’t matter what they think.

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 21, 2014 at 1:06 am

      I didn’t mean to make it sound like I’m not blogging due to rude people. That’s a little part of it, but I have such an amazing support system in person now that it’s hard to take time to share all of my feelings here.

      I miss my blog friends though so I’ll be around…I just may not post how O used to. Of course, that may just happen in phases too.

  • Reply
    Sara
    March 19, 2014 at 11:42 am

    I personally just blog whenever I feel like it. If I don’t blog for months then thats ok. It is your blog and you blog when you want to 🙂

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 21, 2014 at 1:06 am

      I like to think that I’m autonomous like that..

  • Reply
    Patricia
    March 19, 2014 at 11:43 am

    Good to hear from you. Congratulations on a fulfilling life. You deserve to be happy. We all do. If you do stop writing this blog you will be missed. You have inspired many of us who struggle with similar issues in our daily lives. Just remember that GOD loves you so much HE helped guide you along this path.
    With HIS Blessings.
    If you do start another blog I hope you will let us know. Just remember that the negative people are a minority. Do not let a few ruin it for the majority. Follow the path that is best for YOU.

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 21, 2014 at 1:08 am

      I definitely see (in retrospect) that He was drawing me to Him before I even realized it, and I’m so utterly thankful for that.

  • Reply
    Rosaria Cozzolino
    March 19, 2014 at 12:00 pm

    I love reading your blog. Please don’t stop!!!

  • Reply
    divad
    March 19, 2014 at 4:09 pm

    I took a blogging break. A long one. It resulted in a huge weight gain for me but it doesn’t have to be that way. I too find some people horribly judgmental in their comments. The more I lost (94) pounds and started to struggle, the more hurtful they became. It’s a weird social idiom of blogging. I am back to blogging and relosing all I gained (all 94 plus 1), but my blog is a lot less personal. Wishing you the very, very best!

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 21, 2014 at 1:10 am

      There are some things that I’ve never blogged about in the (almost) 5 years that I’ve been blogging here, but for the most part, I’ve put it all out there.

      Some people are lifeless idiots, but most are pretty amazing…

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 21, 2014 at 1:10 am

      And good for you…It’s awesome to hear that you’re doing well again!

  • Reply
    ML
    March 19, 2014 at 6:07 pm

    I am not a blogger and I never really post any comments however I do find your blog very encouraging. So I hope you continue.

    • Reply
      Kenlie
      March 21, 2014 at 1:13 am

      Thank you for the encouragement, ML..

  • Reply
    Cat
    March 26, 2014 at 1:19 pm

    You freaking rock, Kenlie. Thanks for being real and being you. You always seem to know how to say what I’ve been feeling myself. I draw strength and encouragement from your words, especially since I have also gained back about half of my own massive weight loss. I stopped blogging because I was embarrassed to admit it, but have found myself slowly getting back to it in the last few weeks. Do what you need to do, and those that love you will support you no matter what. “The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.”
    Psalm 18:2a (NIV) –

  • Reply
    Alice
    March 29, 2014 at 9:40 am

    I took a blog rest for a ‘few days’ as I said to myself after posting each day for a week on my new blog…that was 3 years ago and I never posted anything on it…always had some excuse. hope same doesn’t happen with you 🙂

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