Most of my friends don’t have weight problems, but I do. It’s fun to go out to eat with them or to bake for them or to have a drink at Starbucks with them. There’s nothing inherently wrong with that either. I’d trade six-pack abs for enjoyable food any day, but I do need to think about what I eat even when the people around me aren’t thinking about it.
My friend, Alicia, is hot. (I can say that because she’s my BFF.) She is barely over 5 ft. tall and doesn’t weigh much more than 100 pounds. She’s tiny, but she fantasizes about sushi just as much as I do.
My friend and colleague, Brandon, is also hot. He’s tall and lean and perfect looking, and like Alicia, he’s Italian. He loves to cook, and he does it very well. Everything he makes is delicious, and he enjoys it. He also works out hard and regularly, and he seems to have a good grip on when to say no.
Another friend is gorgeous. She’d tell you that she wants to lose weight, but she’s perfect looking already. If you have any doubts about that, spend the day with her. Guys want to marry her before they even talk to her. It’s insane. We do a lot together, and she doesn’t have to watch what she eats how I do.
The list could be much longer, but you get the idea. I spend a lot of time with people who love food too, but none of them need to lose 150 pounds.
For some reason, it’s more enjoyable to eat with other people who love to eat, and there’s no shortage of those people in my life. I know that it is 100% my responsibility to limit the amount of food that I consume, but I’m beginning to recognize that eating with others has always given me a feeling of validation.
I’m not a binge eater. I’m a social eater. I am an emotional eater, but I’d rather eat among friends or family than alone. I’d rather dine solo at a restaurant than to sit at my dining table at home.
As I was eating dinner with a few of my colleagues from Plus Inc. recently, I realized that seeing someone else (someone smaller) accept a second helping gave me an emotionally charged green light to have seconds myself.
That behavior is something that has always existed in me, but I never realized it until that night at dinner.
Recognizing the emotions of validation that exist when I eat with others will allow me to adjust my behavior now. My mind was blown, and at this moment, I realize that I need a better reason to consume calories than “well, everyone else is doing it.”
Would I jump off of a bridge just because everyone else is doing it?
Of course I wouldn’t. Why would I let my eating habits be dictated by what others are doing, as opposed to my own nutritional needs?
I’ve been reflecting on my habits and desires lately, and I’m trudging through them because I want to continually work to become a healthier version of myself. I want to control my habits instead of letting them control me.
I’m more mindful than I’ve been in years, and I’m confident that it will start to show on the scale at some point too.