It’s embarrassing to think about how long I lived my life looking for reasons to be offended, but that was my way of life for a long time. It’s a way of life for many people, and I think that as awesome as social media is, it plays a major role in facilitating that on a daily basis. Be honest. Have you ever wanted to scream at someone on Facebook because their posts are so ridiculous? Have you wanted to do that today?
We all know that hurting people hurt people, and I was guilty of that too. I just didn’t realize how often I assumed people would hate me, judge me, and dislike me.
Don’t get me wrong. There are people walking around on this earth who can’t stand me. There are people who don’t even know me who don’t like me, but for the most part, people think I’m pretty cool. I think I’m pretty cool, and I’ve spent the last several years trying to be the kind of friend I want to have.
Am I perfect? Uh…no, but I kind of just expect people to like me. I definitely don’t go into new environments expecting people to dislike me. I also don’t walk in trying to prove that I’m worthy of respect simply because I walked into the room, but that’s relatively new. (I’ve made an effort to be myself over the last several years and now more than ever.)
For years I fought for approval from people who didn’t know me and would likely never know me, and that was exhausting. I assumed that because some guy at an airline thought I was fat and useless that everyone else saw me that way too. No way, man. That’s just not true, but I believed it for a long time anyway.
Now I’m convinced that I’m a pretty likable person. I have confidence that can’t be so easily shaken because even in my vast imperfections God sees me as his masterpiece. (Is anyone still surprised that looking through the lens of God’s character has changed me?)
When I started writing here I really didn’t know that I could be plus-size and loved beyond measure. I didn’t understand that I could live a life of fulfillment and contentment even though I wasn’t perfect, and I definitely didn’t realize that the opinions of others-strangers or not, didn’t have to define me.
For a long time I lived by the approval of others, but there’s so much freedom in loving myself and assuming good intentions in others.
Do you feel like you need approval from others? Do you feel like life got easier when you realized that you don’t have to be loved by everyone?