Category Archives: Location

Are Cankles A Job Hazard?

I feel like I’m adjusting well to life at the office, but I’m having one issue that I wasn’t expecting. My feet and ankles are swelling.

Is it safe to assume that it’s because I’m sitting a lot more than normal? Several people have said that, but why would sitting make your feet swell? What should I be doing to combat it?

I’ve been taking my lunch to work each day, and I’ve made packed healthy and well-balanced meals. I’m also drinking a lot of water. I bring it by the gallon, so I can refill my pretty Starbucks tumbler all day.

I’m not incorporating exercise into my daily routine yet, but I know that will help the swelling too. Won’t it?

It’s amazing to realize how much I move around on an average day. Coming here has definitely made me much more sedentary than I was, so I need to figure out how to be active during the days that I’m here too.

I walk to the far restroom when I need to go, and I spend my little breaks walking around the building. I just need to do more, and I’m not sure where to start. I’m only here Monday through Thursday of most weeks, but that’s a big chunk of time.

I’m eating healthier things, and I’m going to bed earlier. I’m drinking water, and I need to exercise.

Does anyone have ideas to help reduce the swelling? If so, I’d love to hear them.



What Do You Do With Your Old Clothes?

After writing Wednesday’s post (just before bed Tuesday night) I woke up feeling much more rested than I have in the last week or so, and I think that’s a good sign though I plan to speak to the doctor today or tomorrow.  I appreciated the comments yesterday.  I always do, of course, but some of them yesterday made me laugh, a couple made me cringe and a few made me think that I should contact the doc so I am.

And now, on to other things…I received an email recently asking what I do with my clothes when they’re too big.  And I’ll share my answer, but I’d love to hear yours too.

What do you do with your clothes when they become too big?  Do you keep them, or do you get rid of them?

I’m not a fan of clutter.  I really don’t like it at all so when clothes get too big, they do not stay in my closet very long.  I’ve lost 10 to 12 clothing sizes since the beginning of my journey, and I’ve given away almost all of the old clothing.  I did, however, keep a pair of khaki pants and a few other pieces of clothing from my heaviest weight because I like to look at them when I feel like I haven’t done enough.  And I want to have that moment someday…You know, the moment that you hold them up to show what you wore before.

I think it’s important to recognize how far we’ve come so keeping a piece or two of clothing is a fantastic idea, but I don’t keep it all because I have no desire to go back.  Why even leave that option open?  Instead, I wear clothes that fit and flatter my shape now.  I picked up a few stellar pieces at Lane Bryant today with the help of  Danny, a fashion designer for LB that I plan to see again when I’m back in New York in January.

I have pretty good taste in clothes (humble, aren’t I?)  So it’s fun to share with friends and strangers who can benefit from the larger sizes.  I typically share with friends first, and if I can’t find someone who wants what I’m sharing, I donate it.

What do you do with your old clothes?  Do you enjoy the process?

Dating, Err, Not

I’m the girl who always has a boyfriend. Correction, I used to be the girl who always had a boyfriend. And the list of guys from former relationships is (mostly) good. With exception of one or two, I’ve always dated guys who were good marriage material though I’ve never married. And in some ways, I think dating guys that society deemed “a good catch” proved that I was a good catch in spite of the 200+ pounds of excess weight that I carried on my body.

Now, after losing about 130 pounds and counting, I find myself completely dateless with no particular prospects. I’ve only been on one date since December! One date! The guy was tall and handsome and nice, but he couldn’t name the vice president of the United States, and he thought I was weird for being surprised by that.

I’d love to tell you that it’s a liberating feeling – being alone, moving across the country (next month) though the truth is that it’s lonely. And it has forced me to recognize how much I’ve based my self-worth on being in relationships in the past.

Last year, after a serious breakup, I dated several guys in close succession. And while I thought that it was a good idea, I realized later that I was putting way too much pressure on myself to find love. Now, six months and one date later, I’m fighting off this feeling that maybe I’ve lost my chances. Maybe love will never find me. Or maybe (hopefully) it will…..?

I have come a long way on my weight-loss journey, but I have a long way to go. And I am starting to realize that this self-induced pressure to find my soul mate while I’m still heavier than average is understandable – yet silly. Maybe I won’t meet Mr. Right until I’m less than 150 pounds. Or maybe I’ll meet him tomorrow. Maybe I’ve met him, and I don’t know it yet.  Or maybe I’ll meet him when I settle into my new home on the other coast. (That seems logical, doesn’t it?)

Maybe the man who loves me will never know me as an overweight person. I’ve believe, for a long time, that he should, but  my Curvy Nerd friend made an excellent point earlier this week when she said “at this point, I have to do it for me and hope that whomever I meet will understand my past.”  Maybe the same will be true for me.  I’ve separated my self-worth and my my (lack of) dating life so I guess we’ll find out in time.

This journey is definitely about me.  And what’s most important right now, for me, is to recognize my value regardless. I know that I have faults, but I’m also starting to believe that I’m loveable. And I would guess that I have to know that – and really believe it – before I can find true love with someone else.  At least, that’s what the smart people say. 😉

So I’ll continue down my road to self-love, forgiveness and acceptance and hope that somewhere along the way the right person will join me.  Until then, I’ll continue to look forward to the future while appreciating the present.

Unexpected Fears About Weight Watchers Meeting

I’ve said this many times before, but Weight Watchers has changed my life.  More accurately, the people in my Thursday meetings in Westchester County (half an hour or so outside of New York City) changed my life

When I walked into that meeting almost two years ago, I was welcomed immediately! And when I left that evening, I knew that I had just been exactly where I needed to be.  For the next year and a half, I walked into that group every Thursday – often times staying for two meetings because I had bonded with so many in both.

And these members, including our incredible leader and equally amazing receptionist, were there to hug me when I was having a rough time and to celebrate every little accomplishment.  They celebrated when I reached the 100 pounds mark, and when I was at my lowest point at the end, many of them pulled me aside and reminded me that it wouldn’t always feel so bad.

Together, we walked a 5k, though several of us hadn’t done it before.  We donated hundreds of pounds locally during the Lose For Good campaign each year and most importantly, we were able to relate and understand our fears and accomplishments together.

I made friends that I thought I’d keep for a lifetime, and that’s where it gets scary.  It has been months since I last attended a meeting in New York, but it’s time to go back.  When I left New York, everything hurt…my heart, my body and my mind.  I was utterly miserable.  I was saddened by the loss of love that I believed I had (even if I could not yet see that some of the blame was mine.)  I talked about it, cried about it and eventually of tired of hearing myself whine so I stopped.

I stopped blogging about the “gut-wrenching agony” – yes, a flair for the dramatic, I know.  I stopped talking about how unhappy I was.  I changed my phone number and stopped lamenting over my regrets…I cut out as much negativity as I could, and after a few months I started feeling better.

But in cutting out the painful parts, I cut out the good parts too.  It was easier to ignore the people who meant something to me than to admit that I had been wrong in any way.  I wasn’t sure who to trust or who liked me or who had taken the other side.  It seemed easier to “cut my losses” than to face the fear of rejection.  

Now, several months later, I’ve begun dealing with the anger I feel toward others as well as myself.  And I miss my friends.  Some of them are gone forever, and there’s nothing I can do about it.  But now, looking at the big picture, it seems overly dramatic (even for me) to assume that everyone I loved hates me.  In fact, most of them probably thought nothing of it apart from maybe wondering why I fell off of the earth.  And after talking with a close friend moments ago for the first time in months, I am relieved to know that those silly fears were just that – silly fears.
I’ve always said that I wanted to go back to NY, but this self-doubt and rejection didn’t surface until the ticket was purchased.  And these particular fears took me by surprise.  I’m still nervous, but I will not let that keep me from walking into that Weight Watchers meeting filled with people that mean something to me. There may be people who no longer like me or those who expect an explanation, but there could also be a heart-warming homecoming complete with a weigh-in and a hug.

I’m going to hope for the latter and show up regardless because I am done letting fear rule my life.  This whole process is scary, but as I said in a recent post, it’s not nearly as scary as giving up before I try.

Do I Read Your Blog?

I’ve asked this question before, and this probably won’t be the last time.  I appreciate each of you for taking time to share your opinions with me and encourage me, and I want to say thank you. 

Last year I wrote a post asking where you lived, and this year I’m asking to know a little about you.  If you remember the old post then you remember me asking for friends and readers to come out of hiding and share their location.  Now I’d love to know your location, but I’d also like to know a little about your personal journey.  Have you/are you losing weight?  What makes you happy? What motivates you? 

I love blogging!  I’ve learned so much about healthy eating, exercise, fashion and emotional growth through the blogosphere, and I’ve made some incredible friends too.  If you have a blog then perhaps I already read it.  Either way, leave a comment with a link because I want to encourage and support you just as you support me. And I want to give others the opportunity to share in all of the goodness that I’ve received in the blogging community.

So please take a few minutes to share a little about yourself  and a link to your blog if you have one because our personal journeys are greatly enhanced by each other.  And there’s always room for a new friend…

Where Do You Live?

I know that many of your read and never comment, but I want you to participate in something fun with me today. Just leave a comment telling me where you live and a thing or two that you love about it. You can share your name or just leave an anonymous comment, but I’d love to hear from you!

And while we’re at it, do you have a blog? Do I read it? If you have a blog and you’re not sure I’ve seen it, leave a comment below with a link so I can check it out. I love the people I’ve come to know in the blogosphere, and I don’t want to miss anything. 🙂

Wishing you a wonderful Wednesday wherever you are…