Tag Archives: Workout

Workouts and Food

It’s almost weigh-in day, and I’m nervous because of my food choices over the weekend.  I made better choices than I have in years past, but I still ate things that weren’t healthy so it won’t be a surprise if I don’t see a loss.

Since coming home I have eaten more vegetables and protein, and I have continued doing intense workouts that include cardio and strength training.  I feel like I’m in control of my workouts and my food now so I hope to see some positive losses in the weeks to come. I’d like to see the scale move down at least a tad, but I know that I need to be more focused on healthy food choices regardless.

I trained with Ron today, and I was exhausted when we finished.  I don’t typically nap, but I strongly considered it around 7 pm.  I laid on my sofa as I talked on the phone and fought drowsiness, but in the end I didn’t sleep.  Instead, I did a few things around the house, then headed up to the gym for workout #2.


After an exhausting and session with my trainer, I felt motivated to go again (by someone I know who has been doing two-a-days lately) so I did it too.  I did cardio circuits for 45 minutes tonight, and I can safely say that I burned over 1,000 calories again yesterday.


I’m exhausted, and I’m ready for a solid night of sleep.  What happens on the scale will happen, but I’m going to keep working hard and reminding myself that it’s easier to skip unhealthy foods than it is to work them off.  I have trained hard today and tracked everything I ate.  I’m going to focus on making food choices that enhance the work I’m doing in the gym and continue to stay in control.

What are you doing to be healthy today?



A Sweaty Mess…

Some days are hard.  Some weeks are hard, and that’s what I seem to be experiencing right now. I’m burning the candle at both ends.  I mean, I know some people live like this everyday, but this level of intensity is different for me.

I didn’t make time to workout Tuesday and Wednesday so I knew it was important to workout Thursday in spite of my 14+ hour day, but I fought myself.  It took everything I had to put my sneakers back on to sweat when all I wanted to do was crawl under the blankets and sleep.  It took everything I had to make myself exercise when I got home around 11 pm.

My day was long and productive. I got a copy of my lease and scheduled a move-in time for less than two weeks from today.  I learned about the parking garage, cable/internet and had several other questions answered.  I even got a cool little tote filled with neighborhood info and a snazzy umbrella.

Good choices often lead to more good choices, and though I’ve had a tough couple of days I knew that I could wake up today feeling good if I pushed myself a bit.  I made an unhealthy dinner choice, but  why not combat one unhealthy choice with a healthy one?

It took me over an hour to convince myself to workout hard for thirty minutes, but I finally mustered up the strength to complete Level 3 of 30-Day Shred.  I also danced to a few of my favorite Richard Simmons routines and held a few extra planks.

It was cold inside the house, but I still managed to sweat profusely.  And when I was done I was definitely red in the face.  Good grief.

It would have been easy to skip my midnight workout, but I wouldn’t feel as good as I do now.  I’m far from perfect, but I’m trying.  And sometimes getting it done is all we can do.



Challenging Myself This Week

Sunday afternoon I had a conversation with Aunt Janice in which I expressed my desire to jump start my weight-loss again, and she suggested the same thing that Leslie suggested last month.  She said I should cut out carbohydrates for a week and that it would yield great results so I’ve been giving it a try all week.

I’m not following any specific plan. I’m just eating lean protein, an ounce or so of nuts and leafy greens.  I am eating very few carbs, and the carbs I’m eating are healthy ones (not processed.)

I thought it would be terribly difficult, especially since I don’t spend much time at home, but it has been totally manageable.  I’ve been with The Suit a lot this week, and instead of going out like we normally would, we’ve made a conscious effort to eat at (his) home.  He makes the best eggs ever, and I think tonight’s dinner menu will include salmon and leafy greens.  He’s already in great shape, but like the rest of us, when he eats better he feels better so this has been good for both of us.

When I started this challenge Monday morning I knew I wanted to make it through the day, but I wasn’t sure how I would do it.  I’ve been taking it one step at a time, and that seems to be working.  My goal is to eat foods that are high in protein and low in carbs until Sunday (and beyond that, of course) at which point I’ll step on the scale and compare my weight to last week’s weigh-in.  I’m curious to see how the numbers differ, but I’m guessing that I’ll weigh less than I did last week.

I’ve had three solid workouts this week as well, and I’ll complete another one today before a meeting in the afternoon and seeing The Suit in the evening.

I know I can eat carbs and lose weight.  They’re even good for us sometimes, but being in control of what I’m eating again feels good.  Reaching my daily goals and being consistent feels good.

I’m watching my portions without obsessing over them, and I feel like I’m back in control.  That’s a feeling that I haven’t experienced in quite some time, but it’s a feeling I love more than most.  It makes me feel like I can win the battle within myself, and I can’t tell you how much hope I’ve found in making good choices once again.

Have you ever cut out carbs?   Do you pay attention to the amount you eat in a typical day?



Getting Honest About Some Things

Before I begin I have to warn you that this post might be long and scattered because I have a lot to get off my chest today, and I’m not sure where to start.

I could never put into words how much I appreciate the unwavering support that I receive here.  Many of you have been here since the beginning waiting to see me reach my goal, encouraging me to keep trying.  I love you for that, and I hope you never stop.  But right now I need to start digging out of this rut of complacency that I have been in for a lot longer than I want to admit.

Losing 100 pounds is often enough to dramatically alter the lives of those who lose it, but it’s not enough for me. I have experienced so many positive changes, but this is not a post about that.  Right now I need to figure out how to change my mindset, how to make myself move forward again in a strong, steady and powerful way.

I don’t know how to climb out of this proverbial hole that I’ve been living in.  I’ve been living comfortably with the fact that I’ve lost so much weight for so long now that it feels like I need to start over.  My past accomplishments don’t need to be forgotten, but they’re old news…really old news.  And I want to bask in some new accomplishments.

Before I continue, I’m going to ask that everyone refrain from telling me that I’m more than a number on a scale, or that I need to love myself so others will, or that I won’t be happy when I get to my goal if I can’t be happy with myself now.  I’ve heard all of that, and I understand most of it.  But let’s face some facts today.

When I look at my life I see some things that I like and some things I still want to change, but everything is overshadowed by a giant dark cloud that is the number on the scale.

I used to encourage others by saying that you don’t have to reach your goal before you start feeling good about yourself. You just have to start.  And it’s true.  I know it’s true because when I said it, I was feeling it.   Right now, what I accomplished throughout the first part of this journey is simply not enough.  I’m still obese.

I could make a list of reasons I love and respect myself today, and that list has grown more in the last year than it has at any other point in my life.  I know that I’m a good person, and I have been working through emotions that are difficult to face because I’m trying to become a better person.  There’s a lot of work going on inside my head, and that’s important to recognize (even though most of it is far too personal to discuss in such a public forum.)

But the fact remains that when I look at myself, I see the number on the scale.  We can say it doesn’t define me, but the truth is that it is me.  My body grew to its largest size because of what I did to it, and whether I like to admit it or not, my size currently defines who I am above everything else.

Look, I have a host of other imperfections as well, but my size haunts me.  It’s the truth, my truth, and the things that led me to my extreme obesity (and the snowball effect it has had since) are not easy to face.  It’s hard to admit when you’re wrong, but I’ve been wrong a lot.  I made some pretty incredible mistakes.  I mistreated my body and my loved ones, and in many ways I led a life that could never have been happy and free if I didn’t begin to face those issues.

Before I started losing weight I would always say that I was a “good investment.”  I wanted to believe it was true because surely I’d eventually mature into more than I was – a grossly overweight, unhappy, unmotivated, unsuccessful shell of a human-being who didn’t value herself enough to create any positive change in herself.  (Yeah, the truth hurts, and it’s still not easy to admit now.)  But that’s how I viewed myself.

When guilt set in I told myself that I’d do better tomorrow.  I told myself constantly that the future was filled with hope, yet I failed to give myself any reasons to be hopeful.

Fast-forward to the present: I can’t say that I’m as horribly unhappy or unmotivated now as I was prior to 2009.  As I said, I like a lot of things about my life these days, but there are still some major things I need to change.

I need to change my environment.  I prefer living alone and in a city so I am planning a move into a cute little apartment in downtown New Orleans in the Fall.  Living alone will be good for me.  Controlling what is in the pantry and the refrigerator will be good for me.  I know that, but I also realize that everything I eat now is a choice.  It’s my choice, and it’s up to me to make better decisions.  One thing I’ve noticed spending most of my time downtown is that I’m more likely to go out for food.  It will be easier when I have my own little kitchen, but I will still have to make choices.  Living alone won’t solve everything, but it will be a big leap in the right direction.

I also need to claim what I really want.  I mean, I wish I was fit and trim, but we all know that I have to do a lot more than wish to be at goal.  It looks like I’m going to have to fight a hell of a lot harder than I did when I started my journey, and I have to accept that.  End of story.

I need a routine too.  I’m always on the go, and I don’t spend a lot of time in one place.  Just in the last few months I’ve been in Colorado, Virginia, D.C., New York, Houston, etc.  And over the next couple of months I’ll be in New York again, Baltimore, Los Angeles and Dallas (maybe Oklahoma too.)  Traveling a lot means that I have to have a different game plan.  I lost weight when I traveled before so I know it’s possible, but I have to be mindful.

I’m also lacking accountability.  I left Weight Watchers again recently after another bout of frustration with PointsPlus, and now my meeting no longer exists.  Say what you will, but weighing in at meetings every week changed my life.  I need to find a new meeting and make it my highest priority again.

I’ve gotten lazy with my workouts too.  Sure, I do them occasionally, but I love working out.  I crave endorphins nearly everyday so why the hell am I not doing it?  I don’t have a gym membership anymore, but there’s nothing stopping me from joining another one.  I’ll work that out this week, but until then I will do 30-Day Shred at home at least 5 times over the next 7 days.

I could drone on for hours about why it’s hard and how it’s not fair that I have so much further to go than the average person who loses as much as I’ve lost, but lamenting the work I have to do will not bring me closer to my goal.

I still say no to myself a lot more than I say yes, but I’m not doing enough.  I know that, and I take responsibility for that.

The fact is that my actions don’t help or hurt anyone except me.  I’m surrounded by people who love me and want me to be happy and healthy, but I have to get there on my own.  I’m happier than I was at 400+ pounds, but I’m not as happy as I’ll be at 150 pounds.  And it’s not because I don’t think I don’t deserve to be happy now.  It’s because I know that I am capable of so much more.

I’m preparing a life for myself in which obesity will no longer define me.  I’m in school studying Public Relations. (Yep, I declared recently.)  And I’m dreaming of a day when I can claim what I want for myself in my career and in relationships without the worry that my body is keeping me from fulfilling my desires.

This is my reality, friends.  This is my struggle, and no one can fix it except me.  Last week I admitted that I don’t know how, and sadly, I have not found the answer yet.  The truth is I can’t imagine stepping on the scale and seeing 275 or 250, or 199.  (I could see  the first number in the next month or so, but it feels as far as Mars!)

I don’t know how I did what I did the first time.  I don’t know how to wake up every morning with purpose.  I don’t know how to convince myself that today is the day (not tomorrow.)

I feel an utter lack of confidence and an overwhelming amount of insecurity, but I know what I want today.  I know what I want for my future, and I know that it’s mine for the taking.  I also know that I don’t have to get to my goal before I can start feeling on top of the world again.  I know I just have to start moving toward it.

This is my journey, and I’m doing things on my time.  I just need to turn the clock on again, and I need to remind myself that I’m worthy of it if I’m willing to work for it.



A Quick Question

My workouts have been a mixed bag this month, but overall I’ve been slacking.  I’m going to hit it hard on my bike today, and that makes me wonder about what you’re doing.

If you’re reading this will you take a minute to share with me?

What kind of workout will you do today?  



Wow…I Really Regret That Workout…

Sometimes I’m inspired to workout in the afternoon instead of the evening, and that’s what happened yesterday after seeing this quote.

When I read that one Facebook, I grabbed my sneakers and hit it hard for about an hour.  And I was reminded as I often am that I like to sweat…a lot.  By the time I leave the gym, I’m usually drenched, and today was no exception.

Mid-workout and sweaty...

My fitness goal for today is to start my workout before noon – something that I don’t often do.  And my goal will be the same tomorrow because I have to catch a flight in the afternoon.

Do you have a fitness goal for today?  If so, what it is?



Not Really Sure What I’m Doing

Yesterday was a fun day for me. Cal came over late afternoon, and he accompanied me to the gym before heading back to my place to help me make dinner.  He grilled steak for fajitas and I chopped and sauteed vegetables.  And we even made salsa with my KitchenAid blender.  Have I ever mentioned that I love fresh cilantro?  It’s true.  Our dinner was amazing, and I was so ready to eat it that I forgot to take a picture…Can you believe that? 😉

After dinner we watched the Presidential debate on Bloomberg (which is so much fun when I can watch with someone who understands what’s going on in my head!) But I have to admit that I was pretty self-conscious before that  (when we arrived at the gym.)   He’s never really seen me sweat (apart from a slight glisten when we took a walk near the Mississippi River) until yesterday, but it’s a big part of who I am so I didn’t hold back.  I tore up the elliptical for a few minutes before working my upper body, and I felt great at the end.

My workouts have been pretty solid since I joined Anytime Fitness.  And while I know I’ll experience a gain on the scale this week (after how I ate last week when Uncle W was in the hospital,)  I’m still pleased with the direction I’m moving in now.  And I know that the scale will start reflecting my efforts soon.  I’ve been killing it at the gym this week, but I worry that I may not be making the most of my time at the gym. I did managed to climb the height of the Empire State Building 2.89 times before hitting the weights.  (Thanks for calculating it Ron and for pointing it out, Anne!)

On the elliptical....

I’m trying to get comfortable with the weight machines at my new gym, and while I have pretty good form, I am trying to utilize machines that I haven’t used up this point.  And now that I’m comfortable with how, I really need to know how much.  I’d like to hire a trainer soon, but I’m not sure where to start with that so I’ve been taking notes and using google to figure out what I should be doing.  I’ve also been keeping a journal of my workouts.  (Yes, I carry a little notebook to the gym so I can remember what I did.)  I write in it after every set.  But there’s no rhyme or reason to my weight training, and I need to change that.  I’ve been feeling sore over the last few days, but not overly sore so I wonder if I’m doing too much or not enough.  I really don’t know.  If you click on the picture below, you’ll see that I’m putting in effort.  But you’ll also see that I’m making it up as I go along.

There's a bicycle on the front of my book, and it says "Life's a Journey." Just saying...


Richard Simmons, while famous for his cardio workouts, teaches the importance of weight training in his classes.  Did you know that he makes toning videos too?   He ends every class with weight training and floor exercises,  And though I’m not at Slimmons every week anymore, I strive to do the kind of workouts that would make Richard proud.  And it’s important to me to make the most out of the time I spend at the gym so it’s my goal to make a better plan.

Uh, for the record, I'm not usually looking up and smiling while I do leg curls.

I’m doing my best right now, but if anyone has advice to offer, I’m willing to listen.  Until then, I’ll just keep doing what I think is right and hoping that I can start seeing the reflection of my efforts on the scale and in the mirror.  Is weight training part of your routine?  Are you nervous to try it because you’re not sure where to start?  Do you have any advice to offer yours truly? 🙂

506 Steps Closer To My Goal

We have good days and bad days, and I’m thankful for the good days that I’ve been experiencing recently.  And I’m even more thankful for the experiences I’ve had with Mom lately – experiences I never thought we’d share – like our time at the gym.  Mom completed 40 minutes on the treadmill last night, and though she was tired, she admitted that she actually enjoyed her workout!  Going to the gym was a first for her last week, but she’s been fully committed to getting the most out of her 7-day pass.  And I’m amazed and thrilled and proud that she wants to continue going.  Working out is great, but working out with Mom has been unexpectedly incredible!

I’ve enjoyed being back at the gym too though I’m still strongly considering a move to Anytime Fitness.  I like the flexibility of working out anytime, and if you know me, you know I’m not opposed to working out after midnight at times.  My first midnight workout happened on Thanksgiving Day (evening) because I preferred to work off the pecan pie as opposed to skipping the pie.  And if I can be up at 3 am to shop, I can be up at midnight to workout.  (Can you tell the holidays are on my mind? hehe)

Last night at the gym I did weight training.  I worked my legs and arms, but I wanted to add some cardio too so guess where I headed…yep, the ladder!  I’m obsessed with that thing!  I love the fact that I can burn over 100 calories in 10 minutes so tonight I did 21 minutes.  My goal was to complete 300 steps, but early in my workout I decided I could safely push myself to 500 so I did – 506 to be exact.  And it felt great!  At one point, about 100 steps in, I was checking my heart rate when a super hot, healthy looking guy stopped running to ask if I was okay.  I explained that I was just letting my heart rest for a minute, and he smiled and said he seriously impressed.  I winked and said “Wait until I reach 500!”  But I still didn’t know that it would happen last night.  Reaching that goal made me feel like a rock star!  If you follow me on twitter, you may already know that “sometimes I feel like Rocky after a good workout, but last night, I felt like I could kick Rocky’s a$$!”

After one day of overeating processed foods on Saturday, my eating has been on point again too.  Last night for dinner, I ate a chicken wrap loaded with vegetables and a wedge of Laughing Cow cheese.  I love wraps though I don’t eat them often so when I spotted Joseph’s Lavish bread (1 p+) at the supermarket, I knew what I was eating for dinner.  It was delicious, nutritious and satisfying so I’ll probably repeat last night’s dinner today.

I feel healthy and strong, and I’m looking forward to seeing the results of my efforts on the scale again Thursday.  Have I mentioned how great it is to have found a Weight Watchers meeting that I’m excited to attend again?  I honestly didn’t think I’d find that when I left New York, but I am so happy that I was wrong.  I’m still far from my goal, but I’m closer than I was yesterday.  And right now, that’s enough….


The First Time

People say that there’s a first time for everything, and it certainly is true for my mom today!  I invited her to join me at the gym yesterday, and she said yes!  She started strong and worked hard on the crossover then tried the arc trainer and sweated off calories on the treadmill!  She also tried a ladder workout that I’m kind of in love with now as well as dabbling in strength exercises.  She wanted to know what it was like to workout in a gym so we covered a lot, and I’m really, really proud of her!

Mom was movin'!

I started on the arc trainer then moved to the elliptical so I was really tired warmed up before I attempted it, and it wasn’t easy.  I did it last night too, and I’m determined to increase my duration on that thing.  Climbing up the continuously moving ladder was difficult, but so rewarding!  I’ll definitely be back to that machine during my next gym visit.  Does anyone else do continuous ladder workouts at the gym?

One day I'm going to look awesome doing this! Wait for it...

I tried some other new things as well.  I did the rope climb before going back to the ladder.  (Yes, I went back to the ladder.)  And the rope looked easy, but a few minutes into my workout, it started feeling much heavier.  And several minutes into it, I realized I’d feel it later.  When I finished, Mom took a quick video of me on the ladder.  Check it out…

During our workout, I also showed Mom how to use the rowing machine, and I was reminded how far I’ve come in my own fitness.  There was a time in which I couldn’t have shown anyone how to use the rowing machine because I was too heavy to even consider trying.  And only a few years ago, I knew nothing about good form on the weight machines, but tonight I was able to show Mom.  And I got to experience the look on her face as she breathed and realized that she was doing it right.  And that felt so good!

I’m not sure if I won Mom over, but she agreed to go back again this week.  That must mean it wasn’t too horrible, right? 😉  When I’m at the gym, it’s usually just my iPhone, ear buds and me, but having Mom with me tonight was so much cooler than that!  When I was on the ladder, trying desperately (and failing several times first) to reach my self-imposed goal, she cheered me on until I did it.

She’s proud of me, and I’m proud of both of us.  As we weigh-in at our weekly meeting later today (she joined last week too) we’ll both know that we deserve to be proud of ourselves this week regardless of the numbers on the scale, but I’m pretty confident that the scale will reflect it too.

I feel healthier and stronger and happier than I’ve felt in a long time, and I’m so thankful for that.


And the winner of the 10-piece Calphalon Unison Cookware Set is Kelly, Future Thin Girl! Congrats Kelly! Look for a message from me in your e-mail, and don’t forget to respond within 48 hours to receive your beautiful set of cookware! Thank you to all who entered! I wish I had a couple hundred sets of cookware to give away, but I don’t so stick around for future giveaways! And have a healthy and happy Thursday!